A Bully is a Bully is a Bully
- Miranda Rochol
- Jul 20, 2017
- 2 min read
We are a transracial family.
Please don’t be color blind.
I witnessed the first time that my 4-year-old black daughter experienced racism last week. She was called a name by two young white girls. On a scale of 1-10, this was probably a “2.” It really wasn’t all that bad – except that the two girls who said it obviously said it out of ignorance and hate. And, then subsequently, we witnessed our daughter’s reaction to the situation.
I was furious. Nobody hurts my baby. Nobody hurts any of my kids! Mama Bear was roaring. We were in a public situation when this happened and so I got management involved. They asked the young girls what they said, and they made up an alternative version of the story, but in the end, they did apologize to my daughter “for the misunderstanding.”
Both my husband and I were shaken up. We knew that being a transracial family would have its challenges, but that didn’t ultimately matter – we love them – and our love will conquer all – right? But to see our daughter be so confused as to why people – other girls – would be mean to her made both of us cry. She is beautiful, extremely smart, and a quite confident little lady. Her future is unlimited – she could own a business, be a Doctor, be a Mama, and/or even be President. It is our job as parents to ensure her self-esteem stays intact so that she can reach her goals – whatever they may be.
Yes, race is part of a person’s identity. No, it is not okay, EVER, to make fun of or talk negatively about a person’s skin color. A bully is a bully is a bully. I would have reacted the same exact way if my white 10-year-old son had been called a name and it hurt him. Unfortunately, when race is introduced into a bully situation, it becomes worse.
We are a transracial family. We love all three of our kids. Please don’t be color blind. Please love and embrace our family and the similarities and differences we have. Please help my black son and my black daughter embrace & love the color of their skin. Please don’t diminish their beauty by telling them color doesn’t matter. Please help them to be proud, confident, aware, and mindful all at the same time.
This may have been the first incident that we witnessed but it made us realize that it definitely will not be the last. It made us realize that we need to have a reaction “baked” for the next time this happens. I thought we were prepared – but we were not.
We are a transracial family. Please don’t be color blind.
Comments